Why don't I begin again with turpentine and patches?

I took that SimilarMinds personality test for the first time in a while. Some things have improved like Vanity and Narcissism, other things haven't changed...

These were some of the ones I scored highest in:
I italicized the strongest points

Histrionic:
strong need for applause, gets angry and frustrated if they don't get what they want, likes to be popular, believes winning is no fun unless people know you won, desires more attention, competes for the spotlight, grew up feeling they had to stand out to be happy, gets attention through negative behavior, self absorbed, frequently feels envious, likes to manipulate others, superficial, tends to become involved with people quickly, feels best when admired, wants things done their way, used to getting their way, uses their looks to get what they want, quick tempered, impulsive, vain, loves to win awards, performer, entertainer, pleasure seeking, swayed by emotions, prefers instant gratification, self promoting, believes in success through appearances, wealth seeking

Paranoia:
suspicious of others until they have proven themselves trustworthy, more doubt than belief, preoccuppied with death and suffering, fears being harmed or controlled, bitter, looks for hidden meaning in things, personality is centered around low self esteem issues, feels misunderstood, thinks people would not like them if they really knew them, defensive, often experiences disgust, love-hate relationships with most things, likes to test people's loyalty, thinks life is overrated, focuses on suffering, feels like an outsider, existentially depressed, does not trust what people say, prone to shame, suffers from depression, knows the dark side of life very well, attracted to things associated with sadness, would rather remain alone than risk rejection, hard to get to know, makes enemies, loner

Avoidant:
loner, limits social interaction because it's draining, does not express emotions easily, shy, does not like most people, does not think most people like them, nothing really pleases them, prefers to dress down (hide attractiveness), considered weird by others, values personal privacy above personal relationships, feels dejected and better off alone, neglects self, has low self esteem issues, can't find meaning in life, seeks wholeness through isolation, hard to get to know, emotionally numb, even in a relationship they desire a sense of seperateness, thinks life is overrated, would rather be alone then risk rejection, thinks people would not like them if they really knew them, feels like an outsider, afraid to show it when they like some one, aversion to physical contact, somewhat asexual, prone to shame, existentially depressed, prone to focus on suffering, bitter, does not like happy people, poor self image, anhedonic

As well as Dependency, Peter Pan Syndrome, and Need to Dominate.


Aside from this today proved to be a day of high highs and low lows; everything ended on a fairly positive note, however. Days like today are nice though, because I love the idea of laying around talking honestly, comfortably and truthfully. I love when you're talking to someone so honestly and real that it's almost painful. I love being on the receiving end as well. I love trusting and being trusted. I suppose that's silly, though because who doesn't enjoy that?

Needs and love and happiness and failure, people and perception the future and the things that happen, good friends and bad people, understanding and ignorance. There's a part of me that wishes everyday could be like this.